The Beginning

Amanda Richardson stared at the page in front of her with an open-mouthed look of delighted disbelief. Feeling another wave of skepticism coming, she read the ad out loud again. "Scientist looking for willing participants in scientific study. $150.00 per hour. No medical check. No background or credit check. Simply arrive at said address. First come first hired." Even as her eyes skimmed the newspaper ad she still didn't believe it. Finally it occurred to her that it couldn't hurt to check it out. With her mind made up, she reached into her worn jacket and pulled out a crumpled five dollar bill. Nodding in the direction of the waitress, she stuffed her hands into the thinning pockets of her faded jeans and allowed her scuffed sneakers to drag across the dusty floor of the diner. Amanda glanced at the clock in the back corner quickly noting that the greasy antique read 10:20am. Aware that if she continued to lag she could be late, Amanda allowed her slender body to adapt a more purposeful stride as she rushed to the place of her appointment.
Presently she strode up to a dignified looking house. This was easily the most expensive-looking house on the entire block. "6384..."she murmured as she leaned across the railing on the left side of the porch. Glancing up again, despite the vines and the unchecked growth, this was still a nice house. Would have in fact been one of the better homes in West Willow if the lawn and the house itself were looked after more often. Mentally putting an end to her musings, she summoned her courage and bravely knocked on the door. Almost immediately the door was promptly opened by a rather polished man who looked to be anywhere from his mid-thirties to his very early forties. Expecting him to say something, Amanda observed the man while she waited for him to start his pleasantries.
The individual standing in front of her was a man of average height between five-ten and six feet tall with a fit medium build that realistically couldn't have been more than 185 pounds. He had smooth, even features that had a distinctly Mediterranean appearance. He would have been handsome had it not been for his eyes. Clear, pale, and colorless. Eyes that indicated a man who observed everything and absorbed nothing. Eyes that were so assessing that she was unable to meet his gaze beyond a half second. It has been said that the eyes are the windows to the soul, and glancing and wincing at the colorless black holes her porch companion had for eyes, Amanda was chillingly convinced that if he had been blessed with a soul at birth he was surely losing a part of his humanity that was almost if not completely gone.

Introduction

Dear Reader,

Before you read this, there are some things I need you to understand. First of all I wish you to see that I am not an evil man. In fact for exactly the opposite reason, I have done the things you’ll see. Secondly, I want you to see that I am a successful man. I have wealth, education, and prestige but yet I find myself growing more and more calloused. In fact so much so that sometimes I find myself caught in quandaries that have me unable to recognize what is right and what is wrong, although a better or even a normal person would know the difference in the same situation. I know I am sick. I know something is wrong with me. And I have finally pinpointed a cause.

I suffer from a severe searing of the conscience. The loss of which I fear will be the loss of my sense of humanity. In fewer words I am like a prenatal serial killer. Growing and strengthening unseen from the outside, but capable of so much evil when unleashed. I for one do not wish to see the results of what happens when a man of my stature degenerates into something so depraved. Lastly, you must grasp the fact that I have attempted far more in terms of cures- things like education, pleasure, medication, and hard work- than anyone before me. Dear reader, understand that I do the things I do because I must cure myself of my illness at all costs, and everything I have tried has not worked.

But of what interest are my ramblings to you? Let me explain what’s happening. With the last of my abilities I have concocted a simulation if you will. Lover of science that I am, I have successfully devised an experiment that will divide the three parts of man: the good, the bad, and the undecided-and make them tangible characteristics. The quantity of the side (good or bad) that is represented by the characteristics shown should measure a person’s basic goodness or lack thereof. My reasoning states that out of our heart’s intentions we behave in a certain way. This way it can be seen and measured. The one problem I see is that I know I am more evil than good, and as such I will not and can not be my own subject.

With the information I discover and the inner qualities I may have overlooked, a successful experiment may pave the way for me to be human again. On the other hand if this fails, I will be a sociopath. Something that could literally be the death of me and who knows how many others... How does the experiment change anything? Well according to my calculations it is possible to kill the attribute that one does not want to have. If I can just observe the effects of this on an average human-being, I will have no questions unanswered.

Now that I think about it, it’s actually for the best that you came now because this is where science gets interesting…but I digress. Ladies and gentlemen I hope you are ready. Welcome to my experiment…pray that it works. This is the experiment.

Sincerely,
Richard Kingston.